I’ve always naturally been a friendly person. I could go to an event alone, or to a bar, and be totally comfortable striking up a conversation with a complete stranger.
So, one evening my friend invited me to his 30th birthday party, and I couldn’t get anybody to go with me, so I figured I would just go alone, and if I got bored then I would just make up an excuse and leave early.
Once I got there I chatted with the birthday boy for a bit, but because it was his party, I couldn’t monopolize all of his time, so I ended up just casually chatting with a few strangers here and there, and enjoying a cold beer.
An hour had passed, and I was actually getting a bit tired, so I was about to find my friend and tell him goodbye, when this girl named Kelly came out of nowhere and started talking to me. I had seen her a couple of times around the party, but I didn’t notice her come into the kitchen.
She immediately noticed that my beer was basically empty, and she offered to grab me another drink. I politely declined, and told her that I was just leaving actually. However, Kelly didn’t want to take that as an answer, and she handed me another beer.
I have never turned down free beers before, and I wasn’t about to start then, so I smiled and started sipping the brew. Kelly then started asking me if I was having fun, and who did I come with. I told her that I was actually having fun, though was getting ready to head out, and I told her I came alone.
It was as if I told her that I ate grass or something totally strange, because she gave me the most quizzical look. I was actually used to this look, because usually I get some form of shocked look when I tell people that I go out alone.
I guess it’s not the norm, but I was used to it. Then she complimented my hair, and said she loved how curly and full it was, and asked me about the products that I use. That lead to a 30 minute conversation about all things hair! I don’t know what it is about naturals, but it’s like we have an unspoken common bond through our natural hair.
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By the time the conversation was over, my beer was finished and I told Kelly that I was going to find my friend and head out, and that it was nice meeting her. As I was turning around, she grabbed my arm and said “wait, lets exchange numbers…. just in case I have anymore natural hair questions.”
I thought that was totally cool, so we exchanged numbers and I went on about my way. Later that night, she text me a smiley face, and said that it was nice meeting me. I replied and said the same. Again, I didn’t think anything of it, and just assumed she was being really nice.
However, the next day she texted me and asked me if I wanted to go to dinner with her, and that it would be her treat, with a wink face emoji. At that point, I was like wait a minute, did she just ask me out on a date? I was totally weirded out and being the non-confrontational person that I am, I simply deleted the text, her number, and added her number to the block list in my iPhone settings.
I didn’t feel comfortable turning her down, and I certainly didn’t want to agree to the date. Later, I texted my friend who’s birthday it was and asked him if he knew that girl, Kelly from his party.. and he said “oh yeah, and I meant to tell you, after you left she told me she was definitely into you. She’s a lesbian, but I thought you knew.” Nope, I didn’t, but since then I have been very aware that there is definitely a thin line between friendly and flirty when it comes to women!