I’ve always naturally been a friendly person. I could go to an event alone, or to a bar, and be totally comfortable striking up a conversation with a complete stranger.
So, one evening my friend invited me to his 30th birthday party, and I couldn’t get anybody to go with me, so I figured I would just go alone, and if I got bored then I would just make up an excuse and leave early.
Once I got there I chatted with the birthday boy for a bit, but because it was his party, I couldn’t monopolize all of his time, so I ended up just casually chatting with a few strangers here and there, and enjoying a cold beer.
An hour had passed, and I was actually getting a bit tired, so I was about to find my friend and tell him goodbye, when this girl named Kelly came out of nowhere and started talking to me. I had seen her a couple of times around the party, but I didn’t notice her come into the kitchen.
She immediately noticed that my beer was basically empty, and she offered to grab me another drink. I politely declined, and told her that I was just leaving actually. However, Kelly didn’t want to take that as an answer, and she handed me another beer.
I have never turned down free beers before, and I wasn’t about to start then, so I smiled and started sipping the brew. Kelly then started asking me if I was having fun, and who did I come with. I told her that I was actually having fun, though was getting ready to head out, and I told her I came alone.
It was as if I told her that I ate grass or something totally strange, because she gave me the most quizzical look. I was actually used to this look, because usually I get some form of shocked look when I tell people that I go out alone.
I guess it’s not the norm, but I was used to it. Then she complimented my hair, and said she loved how curly and full it was, and asked me about the products that I use. That lead to a 30 minute conversation about all things hair! I don’t know what it is about naturals, but it’s like we have an unspoken common bond through our natural hair.
By the time the conversation was over, my beer was finished and I told Kelly that I was going to find my friend and head out, and that it was nice meeting her. As I was turning around, she grabbed my arm and said “wait, lets exchange numbers…. just in case I have anymore natural hair questions.”
I thought that was totally cool, so we exchanged numbers and I went on about my way. Later that night, she text me a smiley face, and said that it was nice meeting me. I replied and said the same. Again, I didn’t think anything of it, and just assumed she was being really nice.
However, the next day she texted me and asked me if I wanted to go to dinner with her, and that it would be her treat, with a wink face emoji. At that point, I was like wait a minute, did she just ask me out on a date? I was totally weirded out and being the non-confrontational person that I am, I simply deleted the text, her number, and added her number to the block list in my iPhone settings.
I didn’t feel comfortable turning her down, and I certainly didn’t want to agree to the date. Later, I texted my friend who’s birthday it was and asked him if he knew that girl, Kelly from his party.. and he said “oh yeah, and I meant to tell you, after you left she told me she was definitely into you. She’s a lesbian, but I thought you knew.” Nope, I didn’t, but since then I have been very aware that there is definitely a thin line between friendly and flirty when it comes to women!